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monkey see monkey do


It was a reasonably nice day and I had some thoughts that I wanted to share with my spouse. I went into our bedroom and began talking about what was on my mind. I had some new ideas and plans for the future, so I was excited. He seemed to be listening, but then all of a sudden, I was left standing alone in the doorway. He quickly walked away, as if I hadn't said anything. Was he dismissing me? Was he ignoring me? At first, I was dumbfounded. This wasn't what I was used to. He doesn't do this.

But at that moment I realized, I do.

Yes, I do and I'm not proud of it. Especially at that moment when he acted just like me. What I had to say seemed to be of no interest to him, like he had better things to do. It was then that I realized what it must be like to deal with me sometimes. That wasn’t a pleasant realization.

Have you noticed that after years together you and your partner start to act in the same ways? Most of the time it's good things. Just like me though, you might notice a Bad Relationship Habit of yours, showing up in your partner. We develop 'emotional contagion' according to a landmark study done at the University of Colorado in 2014. Don't worry it isn't related to COVID-19 and it isn't terrifying. It's simply a process by which we grow to feel the same emotions as our mate. We're great mimics. The longer and happier we are together, the more mirror neurons. So, the next time you see or feel (you’re not so good self) in your mate, use it as a reminder to mind your bad relationship habits. Thomas Use Love Bytes to support you in your daily lover's shape up. Follow me on Instagram @thestagesoflove or follow my FB page, @breathtaking.relationships to receive yours daily. Love, Thomas


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