A Work in Progress
Taking time to re-evaluate and learn breathes new life into everything. Your life and your relationships are in the process of BECOMING. The moment you start believing you have it all figured out is the moment you stop seeing opportunities for change.
A relationship can’t be held in one's mind like a picture. Even holding it like a movie restricts its ability to grow beyond the past. And to be stuck in the past robs you and your partner of the real experience of being alive.
As human beings, it seems we are always driven to look for a plateau. A place in which everything “we like” stays the same. A deep desire for no change (except for that which we want to have changed.)
One of my favorite coaches, Alan Cahn once told me, “the most extraordinary gift you can bestow upon your partner is to NOT know them.” It probably sounds a bit absurd until you take a deeper look at it. It simply means that you see them as who they are right now - allowing the newest version of them to blossom before your eyes.
We are all a work-in-progress. Our relationship is a work-in-progress. This includes our imperfections, our uncertainties, the unknowns, and allowing ourselves and our partners to evolve.
To accept one another as a “work in Progress” is critical to your relationship. Love is the unconditional acceptance in being a part of one another’s “BECOMING”.
Understanding that people change is a basic component of emotional intelligence. Letting your partner shed their illusions, expand their reach, grow a deeper appreciation, and evolve becomes the primary part of being together.
The willingness to hold multiple views of yourself and your partner at the same time, even opposing views are a function of that understanding.
This is truly the adventure of life.